Certain things in life seem to come in cycles. You know what I’m talking about. There are certain things that circle through time and time again. Looking back over my adult life, there are very distinct periods of exhaustion, uncertainty, pain, and constantly being on the go, as well as times of gratitude, consistently finding joy, and being at peace. When I think of those times I can remember exactly where I was, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. They aren’t a one time experience though. Sure the circumstances change, but those cycles still come through.
One time I particularly remember was when I was still in college as an art major and I was doing everything in my power to make photography into something that generated an income. Like I said, I was in school at the time, learning the technicalities of using my camera, and I was so eager to put my new “skills” to use. I had slapped together a website, made business cards, and even got a few jobs, but I was always exhausted by it. It was hard work that always felt like a burden and quite honestly wasn’t worth it. I would edit things for hours in Photoshop because I hadn’t researched other tools, and was burnt out before I even began (I look back at my photography from that period of time and it really isn’t even good!).
The funny thing though, is that usually the times of exhaustion, uncertainty, and pain are directly tied to the times where there is a lack of gratitude, a lack of searching for joy, and a lack of seeking peace. Well, actually it’s not funny, it’s sad. It is sad because I choose to be those things. The specific time that I was burnt out by photography before I even started was because of my motives for doing it in the first place. I simply saw it as a potential way to make money. There was no passion. There was no mission. There was no end goal. The Bible says in James 3, that “where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder.” Looking back, I see that time as a perfect example of the disorder that comes with my selfishness.
I share all of this to be transparent with you , but also to let you know how fulfilling it is to have a passion, a mission, an end goal, and to have talked to God about all of it. I know that nothing I do, or attempt to do, will succeed without His help. The times where I have been completely focused on God have been the times that I have been the most grateful, the most joyful, the most at peace, and the most successful. In that same chapter in James, right after the previous verse, it says that “the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.” When that is what I seek, I am able to offer you amazing things when it comes to photography. Photography is now something with multiple purposes for me. It is a creative outlet for sure, but even more than that it is an opportunity to serve others on important days in their lives, as well as let couples know how much my husband and I care about them as people embarking on a lifelong journey in marriage. It is an opportunity to give, to be selfless, and most importantly to love others! We are grateful for you. We are overjoyed to serve you. We are at peace knowing we are living out our calling.
Talk to you soon!